Two things have already been established on this blog: I am currently studying my little buns off for a big exam, and I also really like drawing on shoes. Both of these factor heavily into the story that I’m about to tell y’all.
I purchased a not inexpensive subscription to a very popular question bank to help me prepare for the big exam. This question bank is so good, so popular, and also costs so much moolah that the company is veeeeeeery invested in making sure medical students don’t rip them off by copying all the questions and distributing them amongst ourselves. So, if you use any sort of copy-paste functions, or screen capture software, or sometimes just random other applications while a test is active, the question bank just goes AWOOGA and shuts down and your name gets put on the bad books somewhere. Very understandable, non? ANYWAY. The other night, I was in the middle of a very stimulating set of questions on the musculoskeletal system when I minimized the test to go use the restroom. Upon returning, I completely forgot that I had an active test running, and started putzin’ around on the magical Internets. I somehow almost immediately ended up on the Vogue website, looking at a photospread of cats posing with fancy, expensive and hideously fashionable shoes (I know. Don’t ask). And then I saw one pair of magnificent Mary Janes with cats on them.
I loved them. I had to have them. Except not, because they cost more than I spend on rent and groceries combined in a month. So of course, that means I had to make them. And what did I do to preserve my memory of these magical shoes, for crafting at a later date? I took a screenshot. (We pause for a moment of realization of my foolishness.) Of course, my QBank immediately went into Defcon Zero Threat Level Midnight Mode and sent me a very polite popup informing me that my exam was terminated and a recording of my user ID and aberrant behavior had been sent to the company. Ruh roh? Being a high strung medical student basically means that I am guaranteed to overreact to any trigger and naturally, I became convinced that I was in Big Trouble for taking this one silly screenshot. So then I sent a very apologetic email in which I also attached the screenshot that caused all the trouble, figuring that an open admission of complete idiocy and frivolousness would be enough to absolve me. And you know what? It did. Granted, my email and the picture of the shoes are probably hanging on a wall of shame in the UWorld office somewhere (at least it wasn’t a screenshot of parasites falling out of people’s butts (whichItotallydonothavesavedonmyharddrivenopenoway)), but that’s a price I’m willing to pay. Having no dignity and an unabashed love for cats does pay off (sometimes).
Once I knew I was not going to end up in medical student jail (like, jail beyond the metaphorical jail that is being in medical school, yuk yuk), this was just a quickie project – sharpie on a pair of canvas sneakers I had already. Safe to say I’ve learned my lesson and now I have the shoes to remind me.